One day I was sitting at my desk and a student of mine asked to talk to me. I was typing on my computer preparing for my next lesson while my students were silent reading. It was Thursday and I was so happy that we made it over hump day because I could not wait for the weekend to finally hit. The student said “Mr. Towner can I ask you a question?” I said “Wassup”. She said I have a boyfriend that keeps cheating on me. He always tells me he loves me, but he is constantly flirting with other girls. He sometimes curses at me and then later tells me “I am sorry I love you”. One day when I was walking to class I saw him kissing another girl in the quad area. What do I do Mr. Towner? I just want him to end things with me. I just want him to say “ITS OVER”. I want him to finally break up with me because I am not strong enough to let him go.
I said my child hes already told you that he doesn’t want to be with you. How many ways does he have to tell you that he has moved on? A person doesn’t have to tell you that it is over for you to know that it is over. It almost seemed like she was looking passed me as I was helping her face reality. Her eyes seemed to space off in the memories they had when they first got together. Everyone remembers that honey moon stage when you felt like they could do you no wrong.
At that point I realized in our lives we try to make excuses for why we are still with a person. Sometimes our heart isn’t ready to let a person go, so we put ourselves through suffering and pain. I believe that reality finally hit her that day. All she could do is weep while I was trying to encourage her. She didn’t want to go to the bathroom, but instead she put her face in her book as she was sitting at her desk and cried puddles of tears. The school counselor came to pick her up. She put all her eggs in one basket and allowed who she was to be defined by how much attention he showed her. Many of us have been in her situations. We make excuses. We have to learn to see things for what they are instead of what we want them to be. We live and we learn. What makes us want to stay with a human being that wants nothing to do with us? What makes us crave for that “no” when they have already stated no in their actions? Why can’t we just accept the truth and walk away? We beg for the truth but we only want it when it works in our favor.
I pray for all the hurting souls tonight that feel neglected and worthless by the one they love. I pray that God gives you the strength to walk away and not turn back to a toxic situation. I pray that God gives you the heart to forgive them.My God can do anything. Just trust, believe and stand on his word. It takes times.