Your mind is telling you to
you’re not good enough…
no one loves you..
your life is meaningless..
you’re a failure..
You have no friends..
Nobody is going to miss you when you’re gone..
What you did is unforgivable and when everyone finds out what you did…you’re going to lose everything so you might as well end your life…
Those are just a few things that run through the human mind when the enemy is attacking us with all these demonic thoughts. That’s not even half the thoughts people think about on a daily bases. Can you imagine all the other nasty thoughts that the devil plunges on people? Sometimes in life we face demonic attacks and if we aren’t prayed up it is easy for our mind to believe all of those mean, nasty and ugly things.
My mom use to always tell me growing up not to forget who you are because if you forget who you are then it is easy to believe what someone says about you. I didn’t understand those words as a child, but those words became vitally important during my teenage years and up. During my high school years I was bullied very bad. I am not going to go over every single story but one day I was the MC at my local high school rally and students jumped on the stage while I had the mic in my hand slapping and beating me up. People from the crowd began laughing yelling “Beat him up..” and all kinds of hurtful derogatory terms I will not repeat. I was embarrassed, humiliated and depressed for years after that. There were nights I cried so much I began to lose my memory slowly. I would take a shower and then 5 minutes later jump back in because I forgot that I just took one. I was slowly losing my mind.
That summer I went to church camp and the youth minister helped me forgive my enemies and myself for some of the shameful things I told myself eternally. It took me years to forgive some people. The hardest part was forgiving myself as well. I had to make peace with myself and others that hurt me: letting them go out of my mind. I prayed in my room and rededicated my life to Christ.
My mom always told me to tell my bullies “GIVE ME 5 years…”
It’s been more than 5 years and now I am a high school teacher in Los Angeles in a low income area giving back to communities of color and a successful universal self published author. The reason why I announce my accomplishments is because if I had killed myself I wouldn’t be where I am at now. I wouldn’t be giving my students advice letting them know it’s going to be ok and dry those eyes and smile. I wouldn’t be able to blog about how God delivered me from the hands of the enemy. I had to go through all the hell to push me to where I am at now. All along God was allowing these things to happen to me so I can write this book and use my experience to help others. In order to relate to others you have to go through a lot.
Whatever you are going through right now at this present time don’t give up. You’re not going through all of this for no reason… you’re going through this because God wants to use you like never before in your next season. If you can get through this then you can get through anything. Look at me I am a living witness. Now when people laugh at me or mock me I just laugh. I can actually make fun of myself because I’m doing what I love every single day… so jokes on you! All the glory and honor belongs to God.
If you are interested in purchasing a copy my new book titled:
Pieces in the Dark: Turn the Light On 40% of my earnings are going towards my students education and school events.